It's Not My Team

In just a few short hours, my husband's team will be playing in the final game of the year before the Super Bowl.  I live in the land of Target and Best Buy.  But I am from the land of cows and New Glarus.  While back home, I'm not as big of a fan as most, but here, the Packers are my boys.

But Vikings fans are straight up assholes.  I realize that's a blanket statement and I'm sure that there are some quite lovely Purple People Eater supporters out there.  In fact, I'm married to one.  But then again, he's also Canadian so he's polite about nearly everything.  But for the most part, if you bleed purple in gold, which most don't even if they tell you they do - it's the highest amount of fair weathered fans in concentration I've seen, you're not a nice person to anyone who may cheer for somone else.

This is probably heightened toward me because I'm from Wisconsin and the border battle is fierce!

"When's your team play this week?"  

You're right, bud, they don't.  But that doesn't mean I'm ditching them for a new team.  My team's out, so I'm going to sit back and enjoy the games that are still happening.  I'm just not going to automatically jump onto someone else's ship.  I'm simply going to be a Football Fan.

"Of course Lambeau's filled, there's nothing else to do in Wisconsin."

Not true, but way to be small-minded.  They don't call it God's Country for nothing.  People flock to Wisconsin to escape.  Fishing, Hunting, Lake-House-ing, Music Fests, Snowmobiling, Hiking, and so on.  Yes, a lot of it has to do with nature, but there are Art Festivals and Concerts and Plays too.  But the things is, if you're a Football Fan from Wisconsin and you can get tickets to the game, you're there.  Not because there's nothing else to do, but because you're loyal and that's exactly where you want to be!  And almost every football player who has set foot on Lambeau Field will tell you the energy at that stadium is like no other.

"You live here now and your husband's a fan, so how dare you wear your Packer shirt!"

Two things.
1 - Living somewhere doesn't mean you're now a fan.  My husband is still a fierce Winnipeg Jets fan, Wild is a back-up team for him.  And although he's spent most of his life in the USA, damn straight he's cheering for Canadia-land for the Olympics!
2 - My husband is in fact a fan of the Vikings. But he knew I was a Packer Fan on our very first date.  He is part of this house divided and he's OK with that.  It actually makes football season quite fun.  Plus, my wedding vows specifically say, "I promise to never be a Vikings fan.  But with that also promise that petty things like sports rivalries will never rival the love and dedication that we have for each other."

But, what I will do is NOT cheer for the opposing team.  I'm sitting here waiting for the Vikings/Eagles game to start.  I am wearing my Packer shirt, not Eagles colors.  I will watch the game with little more than observing comments, not longing for either side to be the champion.  You know what? I am cheering for my husband to be happy.  So take that however you will.

I am ultimately into not judging people for their frivilous preferences.  You are a man and enjoy the company of other men, great!  You are a chef and refuse to use raw onions, good for you!  You're a clay potter and prefer to use blue and greens and not reds, hooray!  You're a baker and refuse to bake a cake for someone because of their religous preferences, hold up.  You're a sports fan that chastises another for liking an opposing team, get a life.

At the end of the day, we have a lot more pressing things in the world to worry about than what sports colors or logos someone is wearing.  Go volunteer at a food shelter or childrens hospital.

Taking Time

Last night, we fulfilled our Christmas Gift to my husband's 82 year old grandmother.  She's such a sweet lady, still with a sharp mind but her body's still hanging in there.  She's 82 and she's not one of those super grandma's who took up body building or yoga in her later age.  She's the grandma who makes you cookies and hangs out with her quilting buddies.  Gravity has been taking her toll and although she thinks she's taller than my mother-in-law, like she had been at one point in her life, she is now quite a few inches shorter than her daughter.  

At 82, or 75, 79, or 84 like the rest of our grandma's who are all still alive, what the heck do you get them?  I once heard an older lady say under her breath after she opened a gift of a knick-knack from someone, "well, I guess I'll have to find a place in here to put this."  It wasn't in an upbeat, excited way.  It was an obligitory tone.  

And that is where I started my own gift giving theory.  Older people do not want THINGS.  They've had 50 or so years to figure out what they like and they get it themselves. Instead, they want TIME.  

They want you to call.  They want to tell you stories.  They want to enjoy your company and hear your stories.  They want to play with your children or animals.  They want to treat you or start giving you their things.  

They don't want things, but rather they want you to care enough about them to carve a few moments out of your day to give them a jingle, or as we did with grandma last night, they want to go to dinner with you.  She sat next to our 1 year old and enjoyed her jibber-jabber and enjoyed playing keep away from her swift hands, enjoyed the wonders of a toddler.  

How much more fulfilling is something like that than a snow-man decoration?  And so, the Grandmas all get some of our homemade jam or bacon or wine, perhaps some other consumables, and we give them TIME - breakfast out or lunch or supper.  For her birthday this year, we took Grandma to the farmers market and brunch. 

Each time we do this, my mother-in-law tells us for months about how much Grandma enjoys her gifts.  Because each day we get with each other truly is a gift.

Just Getting Started

It's a New Year and like so many others, I've decided on some resolutions.  I'm hoping to be part of the mere 8% who will keep at least some of mine.  They include things like losing weight and becoming healthier.  Keeping up with this page is another.  But the biggest thing I want to accomplish this year is to have a cheerier outlook on things.

You see, I have my fair share of flaws and some of those are contradicting.  For example, I do not care what anyone thinks of me yet I want everyone to like and accept me for who I am.  These are almost perfectly opposites.  And they pull me into an emotional roller coaster all too often.  Just ask my husband.  There's a lot of venting that goes on around this house, a lot of talking things to absolute death.  The same frustrations are vocalized so many times that he's able to tell my story before I even start.  And it's so unsatisfying and frustrating when you are trying to get something off your chest (again) and the person you're unloading to is telling you how to calm your ass down before you even start. 

For Christmas this year, I asked for a simple planner.  All I wanted was a cheap bound book from Target that would fit into my bag and I would be able to jot down things so I know where to be and when and so that I don't overbook myself.  Instead, my brother got me a fancy-schmancy thick, heavy book that had dates on every page, places to write goals, progress, plans to achieve those goals, ways you'll reward yourself when you achieve your goals, inspirational sayings, stickers, etc...  I was so disappointed, but he was so proud of this thing.  I was so disappointed that I sulked for a couple days.  Not major sulking, it's a planner for cripes sake, but every time I saw the thing, out would come a sigh and a wish ran through my head that all I wanted was a $10 guy from Target. 

But he was so proud of this thing.  He clearly looked through at least a handful of planners and carefully and thoughtfully selected this thing for me.  It's a blush pink shiny book and has a rainbow of inspriational words pressed into the cover.  And so, I eventually came to the conclusion that the planner wasn't the issue, it was a fine planner.  The issue was me. 

I have a short fuse and almost always prepare for the worst so that when it turns out better than I prepared for, the situation was a win.  But this is so incredibly toxic.  Living in the land of the negative.  Always thinking about the negative starts to make your world and everyone in it negative too. 

So, this blush, shiny book was going to be my new friend.  And I was going to turn this year around to be something happier and new!  I'm trying to think before I blow in the morning.  After my husband leaves, it's just me, a threenager, independent one year old and the whiniest dog on the face of the earth.  And the potty training, taking off clothes as quickly as they're put on and the incessant in-out-in-out-whine-whine-whine-in-out-in-whine......that continues for at least 5 more years.... it all builds up and makes me yell at least once or twice after daddy leaves. 

And so, I need goals.  Checkpoints.  and my fancy-schmancy new planner lays it all out for me.  It has places for all the things I'm trying to do.  It's a visual I look at daily so I'm reminded to stay on track and keep myself on track. 

That planner is exactly how I want my year to be.  I want this year to be true happiness.  And with two beautiful and funny kids and one very patient and loving husband, cheers to the best year yet.